The Department of New Words// Pantsy.

PANTSY (pron. pæn(t)s-EE)

A combination form of the truncated noun Pantaloon, orig. from French c. 1600 CE Panteleon (see Fericunde’s apocryphal apocalyptical text “La Mort des Jours”) previously witnessed in non-distinct Old French and Latin forms (see Divius’ “Song of Seasons”), referring to a garment bound tightly at the hips and buttocks, then leading to two distinct tunnels of cloth provided for each leg – hence the typical plural form pants instead of pant – thereby separating the legs and allowing them to operate dividually, the fabric then proceeding directly to form cuffs at the top of the shoes, typically revealing aforementioned footwear; and the adjective Antsy, of or pertaining to the actions of nervous, fluttered, unflighted, rapid-fire – literally and figuratively, see second half of definition – yet highly social insects that sometimes operate in a spirited, annoyed manner when some gargantuan monster with a great magnifying lens stands over these creatures and proceeds to burn off either various portions or the entirety of their bodies, which are typically either found in the black or red variety and to the naked eye appear smooth, shellacked and shiny though upon closer examination – bearing in mind that one should not use the examining lens to magnify direct light upon them lest they should combust – seem to have tiny cilium around their body, which is composed of thorax, mandible, antennae, pincers, abdomen, spleen, exoskeleton, egg sack, and personality, the word Ant stemming from the Old Gaelic Ænth, its first known usage being c. 974 CE, register 478 of the War of Haelrthic Tapestry, which can be found in partial exhibition at a museum along the Jersey coast.

Def 1. – (adj.) THE WILL OR NERVOUS DESIRE TO PUT ON OR REMOVE A PAIR OF PANTS FROM ONESELF, a condition oftentimes situationally exacerbated by drunkenness or lethargy.

Def 2. – (adj.) THE UNEXPRESSED WISH TO PUT ON OR REMOVE ANOTHER PERSON’S PAIR OF PANTS, a condition oftentimes situationally exacerbated by drunkenness or lethargy.

Def 3. – (adj.) A STATE OF BEING WITHOUT PANTS AND LONGING FOR A PAIR OF PANTS TO GARMENT ONESELF WITH; A STATE OF BEING WITH PANTS BUT WISHING FOR ANOTHER PAIR MORE SUITED TO IDIOSYNCRASIES OF PERSONAL TASTE AT A GIVEN MOMENT.

Because this word loosely forms its own antonym and synonym, usage should be avoided when not in direct visual contact with the person being addressed. Distinction should be made in the action of the narration in order to avoid misinterpretations. Not to be confused in given conversation with the similar sounding word PANSY (n., pron. pænz-EE), which, colloquially, may be considered an insult, though the latter word requires either a direct or indirect article in its nominal form (i.e., a pansy, the pansy), unless being used as an exclamatory (i.e., Pansy!).

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Filed under Proposed Addenda to the English Language//

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